When my SO (26M) and I (23F) have sex, sometimes it's fine. But lately, it's been incredibly painful???

I tried finding something similar, but had no luck.

I'm very petite, and he's a bit above average. Sometimes when we have sex, it feels like someone is stabbing me in the right side of my abdomen. I assume he's just hitting my cervical wall. It also feels like sometimes he's hitting a ridge, and I can feel it click and it's extremely uncomfortable.

But also, we try to use lubrication, but it gets to the point where I feel like my insides are on fire. It's like the pain starts on the outside of my clitoris, and hurts all the way inside (not my bladder). It's like his penis is a hot curling iron that keeps going in and out. It doesn't hurt until we have sex, and then a short time afterwards. We tried to have sex about a half hour ago, and I'm still feeling discomfort.

I'm really sensitive to sex, and sometimes my minoras swell up pretty bad afterwards.

We have incredible sex, and I start crying when we start to and I have to make him stop because it's so unbearable. He is very understanding, and never gets upset. But I feel awful and insecure because I can't have sex with my boyfriend unless I push through the pain.

I've been on Ortho Tri-Cyclen for about 7 weeks now, could this be the problem?

I'm pretty agoraphobic and I hate going to the doctor, so I figured I'd ask here first.

Help :(

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honeyinmyhair
5 Answers
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Yeah, I usually end up yelling "NOT SO DEEP!"

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This is advice coming from my own sexual experience with a "bigger" guy, not from a medical standpoint. Start slow. You can almost feel like your vagina spasming around him, and then it calms down. I made him pull out until it calmed down and tried again. Repeat. It can take a few times until it basically stretches to a point where it's not uncomfortable, and then it feels pretty damn good, but even then, I had to ask him to be careful and not bang too hard away when he got into it. It's likely not the oral contraceptive either.

Oh and to be honest with you, your primary doctor won't really know how to answer this question. The most is that a gyn will be able to look at your vagina and see how bad the bruising is, or if it's torn.

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It can get bruised? I guess that sort of makes sense. It's just not something you even hear about. It definitely feels like it's bruised. But I've also been worried it's something serious. Cervical cancer is in my maternal side of the family.

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Yeah, if he hits your cervix when he thrusts, it can be bruised and that's where the pain is mostly from. Hence, tell him to take it easy on the thrusting deep part. Even when I could handle the ex in certain positions, other positions made him go deeper and more prone to painful sex. Going into graphic territory here, but being on top, or missionary with the frog legs was probably easiest. If I had my legs closed and straight over his shoulder it hurt more.

Cerv cancer is a separate issue. You can get HPV vaccines, and annual paps to screen for it. But no, cervical cancer is unlikely in this situation for the cause of your pain.

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Haha, the first time when my vagina didn't know how to handle him, I was just doubled over, whimpering. It takes time. Be good to your lady bits.

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